Tobold's Blog
Friday, March 19, 2010
 
I got Gevlon worried

I must admit that I always thought that Gevlon, like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, had no heart. When last year I pulled the stunt of claiming to be somebody else (to make a point about identity on the internet), I choose Gevlon for the simple reason that he was the least likely to get upset about somebody stealing his identity. I thought Gevlon was intelligent, but was completely lacking what is called "Emotional Intelligence". I thought he simply doesn't understand people, what makes them tick, and is thus stuck in an endless rant about why the emotional things people do aren't rational. So it was touching to read Gevlon blogging that he is worried about me. Gee, thanks Gevlon, that is awfully nice of you! I didn't realize you cared so much!

But don't worry, Gevlon, you and the other people worrying about me are just operating under a completely false premise. You think that a "normal" blogger does not show any emotions, and that showing any emotions is a sign of the blogger being close to emotional breakdown. I assume that train of thought is a projection of what you'd expect from a professional publication; if an editor of the Wall Street Journal started going all emotional on the front page, people would justifiably be worried, and the editor out of a job.

But a blog is not the Wall Street Journal. A blog is closer to let's say Twitter, where somebody writing "Dammit, my cornflakes were soggy this morning" is a completely normal (and boring) outbreak of emotion. Me posting "Dammit, somebody called me an asshole on his blog" is equally normal, and I'd even say equally boring, although some other blogs apparently operate like tabloids and like to report on which blogger said what about which other blogger.

I'd contest your idea that words can't hurt anyone. If that was the case, why can you sue somebody for emotional damage, or harassment, even if that was only done by words? If the law considers that people can be hurt by words, enough to award them compensation, the hurt must be real enough.

But how much somebody is hurt by words varies a lot from person to person. And so does his reaction to those hurt feelings. Some people are easily hurt, but bottle all that emotional damage up until they explode. Me, being called names annoys me a bit, comparably in annoyance to those soggy cornflakes, or the guy who took the last coffee from the office coffee machine without brewing a new pot. Only I am unusually chatty, as over 3,000 blog posts should be ample proof of, and so I'm likely to post about such minor annoyances. Other people, when finding that you can't change the country field on your Playstation Network registration just grumble a bit into their beard, me I write a full page of rant about it. That doesn't mean that minor annoyances hurt me more than anyone else, it only means that I'm posting every little thought that goes through my head. And I'd even claim that in the end I am *more* mentally stable than somebody who eats up all those little annoyances, because by airing mine, I deal with them, and then can forget them without losing any sleep.

So, Gevlon, thank you again for being so worried about me, but it is really not necessary. I'm fine. The only thing I'm suffering from is verbosity. ;)
Comments:
It's not just complete breakdown of the writer can damage a blog. If he becomes emotional and rants more and more, his blog becomes equal to Twitter, that I don't use for a reason.

I'm obviously aware of the fact that you owe me nothing and blog whatever you want. Yet I prefer quality content instead of "Syncaine called me bad" and I can worry of losing the preferred content (just like I can worry about rain, despite I'm not entitled for a sunny day).

You can sue for emotional damage because socials are a majority. Once upon a time it was illegal to be a witch. http://greedygoblin.blogspot.com/2009/01/conflicting-interests.html
 
I think you are inventing a distinction here that doesn't really exist. I do not spend part of my time writing "quality content", and part of my time writing "rants". I'm writing "whatever thought is in my head" content all the time.

The reason why I can't just decide to only write "quality content" is that if you'd ask people which posts exactly are quality and which aren't, every reader would give you a different response. Some people only read my WoW posts, others hate my WoW posts and only read when I write general game theory. Some even prefer my more personal posts to dry analysis.

In fact I'm sure that there are people who are complaining about *your* blog, because you don't post useful WoW economic advice any more, and that was the quality content *they* wanted from you. The content of any given blog changes, because it is a reflection of the personal interests of the blogger, and just like your interest changed from economy via raiding to PvP, the content of your blog changed. And my interests change with time too, and thus does the content of my blog. It isn't the quality that changes, it is the subject that changes. If the interests of readers and bloggers diverge, some readers switch blogs, while the blog acquires some other new readers whose interests are more aligned with the new focus of the blog. Nothing to worry about.
 
For some people, a Blog is a measurement of their success. They post wild theories and troll-bate on other peoples blogs, because they will draw in readers, and that would mean that they are succesfull.

Both the green dude and syncaine are guilty of this. Or see blogs that way.

Then there are those that use blogs are they where invented, as a web-log about what is going on. It may sound like I am judging who is right here, but that isn't the question really. Its just how you want to use your blog.
I pretty much like all of Tobolds posts, regardless of topic, because they make me think.

If you really want to understand how the goblin sees blogging, check out his comments on pinkpigtailinn when he first started out. They where all about "so how do you lure people to read your blog".
http://www.pinkpigtailinn.com/2008/09/ask-larsa-how-do-i-make-my-blog-noticed.html

The debate is not about how to write or make is blog as good as possible, but whether or not, picking fights with dwarfpriest.com would give him more readers.
 
Gevlon always had a heart, although he tries mightily to hide it.
 
"No such thing as a bad pageview."
 
Everybody handles their emotions differently. Personally, a life with no emotion at all sounds too bleak and boring to be considered life, but on the other extreme wearing your heart on your sleeve tends to lead to avoiding social contact to cut back on the number of nights you cry yourself to sleep. I've tried both and the moderate approach Tobold usually follows of accepting emotions as they come but not completely losing his head in them seems to work pretty well in my own experience.
 
I just wish that both blogers and commenters would see how powerful words are. And how their meaning can easily be twisted either by the hand of the writer or in the mind of the reader.
 
I just wish that both blogers and commenters would see how powerful words are. And how their meaning can easily be twisted either by the hand of the writer or in the mind of the reader.

I think that is more a problem of words being not powerful enough. I once saw a great picture on communication, where one guy was thinking of a big christmas tree, communicated his idea with the word "tree", and in the mind of his listener an image of an apple tree formed.

The words we use aren't as complex as the ideas we are trying to express with them, which is why we run into communication problems of "twisted" words.

I like Dwism's example of both me and Gevlon using the word "blog", and me meaning "web-log of my thoughts", while Gevlon's idea of what a blog is is apparently a very different one.
 
"I thought Gevlon was intelligent, but was completely lacking what is called "Emotional Intelligence". I thought he simply doesn't understand people, what makes them tick, and is thus stuck in an endless rant about why the emotional things people do aren't rational."

Tobold, you've articulated my thoughts about Gevlon perfectly. I don't think his disdain and dismissal of treating others with respect is a choice for him in a lot of ways. I feel that he has shown great inability to empathize with others, and to know how to treat others in a nice and civil manner.

It's why I stopped reading and commenting on his blog. You can't talk someone out of a position that they don't hold for rational reasons in the first place.

And I think that you made a really good point about "quality content." I don't read your blog just because you talk about MMOs. There are a million other blogs out there about MMOs. I read your blog because of your personality and what and how you decide to write.
 
This makes me think of a few "guild drama" moments I've witnessed. It seems there's always someone who whips out an "emo" attack the moment his opponent expresses an emotion other than a manly-man's righteous rage. Actually, even anger is classified as being emo. It's like the Godwin's Law of online drama.

For folks who avoid emotion, expressing the kinds of things you do, Tobold, WOULD be tantamount to a massive nervous breakdown, so it makes sense he would "worry" about you. Some people cannot understand that being able to experience, manage, and express emotions is a sign of maturity, not weakness.
 
Over time, when getting older, the little annoyances you feel the urge to write about seem to lose their weight and it becomes unnecessary to get them out of your system. Simply because they dont register anymore. In other words you slowly gain perspective and couldnt care less. How about that for an alternate way of coping Tobold?

Also, i'm certain that Gevlon DOES understand people pretty well..
 
I am one of those people who actually does not want their blog to do well. Only reason I even have a blog is because I wanted to post on Gevlon's blog, and I had to sign up, then it had a prompt or a link to start a blog. For all I knew, everybody who posted had a blog. So I named my blog and wrote a couple of things I was thinking. If a bunch of people started posting and asking me questions on my blog, I would not be happy because I don't want to maintain it at all unless I get a bug up my a$$ and want to say something. Most of my interesting opinions (I think) I put on other people's blog. It's all better that way. If somebody says, "Your blog really sucks, Yaggle!", I would probably think, "Yeah absolutely!" but whether I would be hard-working enough to actually type and hit is a matter of random elements including how good the coffee I recently drank was. Today it was bad (I don't like Dunkin' Donuts coffee) but I'm finding a way to spew this out anyways. Jackpot, everybody wins.
 
I wonder if you and GG investigated this? You're free bloggers, i doubt you would; nor should you. ( OTOH, I have higher expectations of you than CBS News or the New York Times.)

I was just wanting to point out that, of course, Crankhealer did not remove anything she wrote from the internet;

Google's cache of one of the entries I read is in URIs like http://74.125.155.132/search?q=cache:EOCWNOCbU1cJ:crankyhealer.wordpress.com/page/2/+site:crankyhealer.wordpress.com+crankyhealer+heal&cd=3&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&client=safari

I am sure there are many others, but almost everyone knows about Google.

N.B.: I AM NOT CRITICIZING OR ACCUSING CRANKY, YOU OR ANYONE. *** I just wanted to make the point that internet items that are cute or clever or noteworthy that might have been innocent last millennium could just be a [viral] marketing campaign in 2010. Could a blogger (Not CH! some gold guide sites might be more likely) with 200 readers get enough publicity to get more people to read her blog entries after it has been "deleted" than before? And then another round of free publicity when "responding to her public" they relaunch? I had not read her blog until after she "deleted" it. Sorry to see her go and for her pain.

It's a different world these days; more interesting, but not better in all ways.
 
I may have only just started to blog, but i use joy and anger (not so much anger) in my blog posting. Why? because my blog is meant to express my feelings and open people up to my view of what i am posting on.
If i get angry because of a silly thing, maybe i am just having a "bad day" and i must say i agree with Tobold said, "I'd even claim that in the end I am *more* mentally stable than somebody who eats up all those little annoyances, because by airing mine, I deal with them, and then can forget them without losing any sleep."

Fallien (mmodownload.net)
 
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