Tobold's Blog
Friday, January 25, 2013
 
European War of Secession

I have a brilliant scenario for a strategy game: It is the year 2018. Europe is divided into a big industrial part, and a smaller part that lives of financial slavery, a practice widely detested by the rest of Europe and in danger of being abolished by law. So Johnny Reb decides to secede, but the other half of Europe erects trade barriers to not let products of the financial slavery in. Tempers flare, the first shots get fired, and shortly after the European War of Secession has started.

Civil War II : European War of Secession is brought to you by The Creative Assembly, makers of the Total War series. Control either the secessionist rebels, or one of the states remaining in the "ever closer union". First game to have sapper units, able to blow up the tunnel connecting the rebel territory to the rest of Europe. Engage in diplomacy as the rebels to exploit the "special relationship", or you'll be crushed by the industrially advanced Union.

Comments:
ROFL Tobold, thank you.

His speech was quite hilarious: "Vote for me, then you get to formally express your fears about the EU sometime later. By the way, the EU is good for the UK."

It's a wonderful example of how belly decisions get in the way of mutual benefit.


 
Haha. It would be funny if it didn't mean that the ConDems would have won another election *omg shoot me now*
 
My favourite kind of ultimatum:

"If you don't do as I say, I may or not have the power to do something about it in several years time and what I do about it is up to a 3rd party who I have no control over."
 
Hold on, what?

France and Belgium is in the industrially powerful Union? Germany doesn't engage in finance?

Are Switzerland and Norway part of the Union? or the Rebel Alliance?

Just because Cameron is confused, doesn't mean the British have to give up their sovereignty.....or are you hankering for the Divine Right of Bureaucrats?
 
You forgot the part where unable to continue to use Johnny Reb as a scapegoat for everything that goes wrong, the remaining Union states start fighting among themselves.

In the alternative timeline expansion, the biggest Industrial powerhouse seeing their biggest trade-partner secceed, goes with them.
 
And you forgot the part where the incredibly poor and financially crippled Southern States of the Union decide to join the Secessionists and launch an offensive from the rear.
 
Sadly I don't know where my poor country will end up in that civil war given that we are ideologically aligned and financially dependent on the Union but geographically totally at the mercy of the secessionists.

I fear we are destined to play the role of the Indian Territory, now known as Oklahoma. Oklahoma was wracked with destruction and ruin during the civil with every able bodied man fighting for one side or the other and a good many fighting for both.
 
The birth rat ein Europe has been so low for so long, this continent is no longer able to fight a war, let alone a civil war.

You need young men in abundance for this.

Europe will wander the line between becoming a totalitarian and a failed state.

Now, I am not much into British politics. And I can't comment on Cameron's character. But anyone who shows Brussels the finger is a beacon of hope for Europe.
 
Addendum: My vivsion for Europe is less of an organized civil war and more a scenario like Bosnia in the 90s.

Beyond politics, there are some ethnical and religious factors that will play a major role a generation from now.
 
Wait a modern war game without Russia, China or Middleastern countries?

Making a shooter game with that backstory would be refreshing, if somewhat controversial.

Can someone point me to an article with the British demands for EU or write here a short resume. Thanks in advance.
 
@Carmedil it is my understanding that they want less foreigners in it.

Oh and there seems to be particular concerns in the popular media about the shape of fruit and vegetables.
 
A war could happen sometime, though not I think as early as 2018.

As for Cameron's speech, my idea is that it is quite a clever move aimed at frustrating federalists over the next few years. The latter will certainly try to exploit the current financial difficulties to press for closer union, and what Cameron has done is to say "we're watching you".

Then again, it is probably mainly aimed at stemming the drift to UKIP in the British electorate. But there's no reason it can't have multiple motivations.
 
Having never seen the source of this post, I have to say that I actually understand quite a bit just from the conversation. Even the post + first three comments was pretty much enough.
 
Somehow I don't think a game of "secession" in Europe would be realistic.

Problems:
How would the War be continued when all army employees expect 10 weeks vacation?

Since all countries in the EU have strict gun control laws... how would you fight? Toothpicks?

Isn't Secession governed by some EU commission and you have to submit a lengthy form for action?

Come on aren't Europeans a bit too wimpy for actual fighting?

The French will not have enough time to surrender to Greece during a secession.

If Lybia is any indication I don't expect it to be a well run war.

How exactly will any military equipment make it to the battlefield. EU members have no heavy lift and always ask US for help.
 
I take it that this post has something to do with Cameron's speech but I am too ignorant and ill informed about european politics to make heads or tails of it.

(Unrelated, but I believe that expression is an almost uniquely american way of saying it, and the british way would be "make head or tail of it", which makes sense as animals rarely have more than one head or tail.)
 
Heh, that's a nice bit of social satire right there, Tobold. Well done. Bonus for the idea itself sounding like a pretty good game too.
 
We need more EU skepticism. I wish we never ever got on this path of a Pan-European (and some bits of Asia too) "super" (hah!) power. We should have sticked with the EEG, a purely economical union (which my country entered as a founding member).

In stead, right now we have a megalomanical civil servant black hole in Brussels which costs billions and does useful things like decide the mimimum size of cucumbers and curvature of bananas.

A currency (the EURO) which costs us (the Dutch) about 10% of our income when introduced, because of lousy and totally unreal exchange rates. The Guilder was a very strong currency at the time (OK, it was riding on the waves of the Deutsch Mark, but still).

Also we have to endure the maniacal need to include every country in Europe and beyond, which will eventually be our downfall (since it also costs BILLIONS). To fund these things i suspect a European tax will be a reality soon...

Down with the EU, the sooner the better.
 
In Ireland we would say "I can't make head nor tail of it".
 
Alas, I'm US and unfortunately unenlightened on the issues that currently blight the EU. You've reminded me that I need to understand what is happening in the world at large.
 
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